As the coronavirus crisis strips back family support systems it’s become clear who’s been holding the fort: women. Women have absorbed the bulk of the economic and emotional impacts, the additional childcare and the home management responsibilities. In some circles these additional burdens have led to coupled mothers claiming they ‘feel like a single mum’. Whilst many have indeed experienced some of…
Solo mum by choice
Why Single Parents Need to be A Protected Group in Law
Did you know that in Britain in 2020 it’s illegal for employers to discriminate against married people, but if you’re single you’re fair game? This *may* have made sense when married people were potentially considered to be less flexible given responsibilities at home and therefore faced unfair treatment in the workplace. But what of now…
2019: My Writing in Review
It’s been a year of much writing, but not so much on my blog. Gone are the days of churning out one post a week. Partly because time is scarce, partly because there’s less emotional turmoil to digest and spit out in black and white. It’s a cliche to talk about my journey as a single…
Single Mum Life Hacks
I don’t write many useful things. I’m more about letting out my emotions for all to read and getting a free dose of therapy whilst I’m at it. But there are some useful things I’ve learned as a single mum of two so I thought I’d share the love. 1. Try not to give a…
Diblings: Donor Siblings
The concept of donor siblings is a funny one. Sibling often means someone you’re related to and/ or have grown up with. Add in the (unknown) donor element to the sibling relationship though and it often means you have no connection beyond a stranger’s kind deed. But for those who want, social media is changing…
The Holiday
How’s the holiday? Was it good? I’m asked. Having fun? It’s an innocent question, from interested friends. As simple to answer as it is to ask, surely? But I have no idea where to start. Good? Bad? A mix of both? It wasn’t in the realms of either. Holidays are for relaxing. After all, sinking…
Dating With Young Kids: The Reality
It’s an irony that’s hard to get around… If you’re a single mum, chances are you went through a lot to gain your single status; divorce and separation aren’t the only ways to single motherhood, but they are the most common. Once you’ve got out of some shit awful relationship and learned to deal with…
Raising Two Kids Solo: The Reality
My path to raising two children solo is slightly unique; we are what is termed a ‘mixed family’. After divorcing my first child’s father, I decided to go it alone and have a second via donor conception. So you could say – more than most – that I chose to parent two as a solo…
What Not To Say To Solo Mums By Choice
We’re always being told what not to say nowadays. If you think I’m about to say to hell with that, think again. Learning to be a little more sensitive can go a long way. Diverse families are becoming more and more common and sometimes it seems others haven’t kept a pace with what this means.…
Living Without Love: Single Motherhood
I’ve lived without love for 1,629 days now. In the early days, hope for a more *real* love sprung forth from the release of “it’s” grip. A love which caused so much pain can’t be true love, can it? Now I could dream big. Four and a half years later, and the mirage of hope…